Holi Hai

First off, Happy Holi.

Now here's my plan for the day.

Sit at the end of the corridor outside my room with a copy of the day's paper, a can of pepper spray and a BB gun. Wait for some poor shmuck to come charging down with colours splashed all over his face and hands. Then mace the fucker in the face just three feet from his target. Watch in satisfaction as he rubs his eyes with his paint-stained hands, hence aggravating the pain further. Then take pot shots at him with the BB gun, not taking care to not hit him in the eyes since they'll be tightly closed (and hopefully burning really badly) anyway. Hopefully by then he'll get the hint that I'm not really interested in colouring myself silly and leave.

Sit back, read the paper till next shmuck comes along.